Strange assumptions

Strange assumptions

We keep running into this strange assumption from the general public and funders– why would it cost money to make it normal for neighbours to know each other? Yet, most people tell us they have little meaningful relationship with their neighbours. And most people tell us how important it is for our present day and future wellbeing that we do have trusting, belonging and supportive relationships with our neighbours. Yet both funders and the general public ask us why it costs money to have neighbours build relationships with each other. For some reason, they assume it should happen naturally, and it can when they engage the Good Neighbour Method, and that costs money.

The Real World

When we talk with funders, they acknowledge that loneliness, divisiveness and isolation are big problems in our society. Most say they want to help solve these problems, they want to fund community projects. They want simple surface level solutions. Complex ideas like … Read the rest

New Year Thoughts for a More Human World

Neighbour Connectedness is fundamental to happiness. So says hundreds of research projects. Finally, some of our leaders are starting to say the same thing.

King Charles II mentioned its importance and Pime Minister Carney talked about looking out for each other in their holiday messages.

To be human is to belong and take responsibility for your neighbours wellbeing. It has been that way since we lived in caves and only in the last 40 years have we fooled ourselves into thinking otherwise.

But it doesn’t have to be this way, we can enhance our humanity by simply connecting with our neighbours. I use the word simply with caution, as for many of us, this is no longer simple.

That is why we have created the Good Neighbour Method, a proven process for recreating our culture of connectedness and mutual support. We know how to do this, and we can make it normal for neighbours to know and support each … Read the rest

Why Is It So Hard to do Good?

 

WHY DON’T OUR GOVERNMENTS WANT TO SOLVE THE LONELINESS PROBLEM?

I have been an entrepreneur most of my working life. It was easy and predictable to make money. Although I never made a lot, I made as much as I wanted. I mostly focused my work on shifting culture within business organizations.

Then 12 years ago, I switched to use my talent and resources to do something good for the world, bring neighbours closer together into trusting relationships for mutual support. That’s when I created the Happy Community Project.

For every step of our journey to shift culture so that it is normal for neighbours to know, care about and support each other, our governments have put up obstacles, objections, rules and barriers.  Even though we have proven our capabilities, we operate in an environment of government mistrust. So today, I ask WHY? What is more important than rebuilding our social fabric that binds us together?

With all the … Read the rest

Communities equal Happiness

It’s been 10 days since the elections in the USA. From my experience with friends and strangers, anxiety and depression levels are way up. Many people are afraid of what might happen because of the election. Literally millions of people have been traumatized by the news.

At Happy Community Project and Good Neighbour Builders Society, we have been working hard to enable communities to come together in a more connected and supportive way. This is important so that individuals and communities as a whole have the social, mental and physical support they need when trauma strikes.

One reaction people can do when traumatized is retreat into isolation and cocoon from all the noise. After all we are independent and are supposed to be strong enough to deal with stuff like this. We believe that a healthier response is to reach out to each other in support. Although we can’t know for sure what will happen and how it may affect … Read the rest

We Can Do Better Than This.

I recently was in a municipality discussing an implementation strategy for the Good Neighbour Method. I met with several leaders in the community including council, administration and Not for Profits.

One of the not-for profits is in charge of delivering meals to people with out means. They tell me how on several occasions, they have called to deliver a meal. No answer. They call again. No answer. So they go knock on the door. No answer. They then call for a wellness check to discover the person living alone had died alone. No one noticed.

I keep hearing stories of how neighbours who live right next door didn’t notice that Mrs. Jones wasn’t about anymore. And Mrs. Jones had no one to call in the neighbourhood.

This is beyond sad. It’s tragic that we are so culturalized to mind our own business that no one notices someone who lived a full and interesting life needs help, or at least the … Read the rest

Right Time, Right Place

I am totally hyped up. For the last two months, I have been giving presentations, key note speaks and talking to community leaders and landlords about belonging communities and how it can be normal for neighbours to know, care about and support each other.

The feedback is that we at the Happy Community Project and Good Neighbour Builders are doing the right thing, in the right way. More importantly, they say we are solving the right problem.

We don’t have a loneliness problem even if Stats Canada says 48% of Canadian are lonely. Similarly for USA, Australia and England. We don’t have a belonging problem. And we don’t have a problem of divisiveness. What we have is a cultural problem that causes these issues.

And if we want to live in a society where it is normal to know and count on your neighbour, we need to change the culture.

That is exactly what we are setting out to do. … Read the rest

The Value of Belonging

Belonging is a fundamental human need. It sits right next to shelter and food on Maslow’s
Hierarchy of Human Needs. And whenever humans have a need, there is a business
opportunity. Property Managers are in an ideal spot to fill this need.
So what is belonging anyway? If we provide belonging, what exactly do we need to provide
so that people feel they belong.
Belonging is an emotional feeling that is triggered by experience. If we want to provide
belonging, we need to provide the right kind of experiences. Here are the 5 main elements
that researchers say people need to experience so they feel like they belong.
#1. Trust: When people are in a community of other people, they need to feel safe. They
need to ‘feel’ they can trust the other community members.
#2. Accepting. Not only do they need to trust others that they won’t cause them harm, they
need to experience acceptance and friendliness. This is … Read the rest

What Does Belonging Mean

There is a crisis of loneliness going on in the developed world. For example, in Canada and the USA, reports show that as many of 50% of the population experiences loneliness. Loneliness leads to all kinds of other problems including mental, physical and social problems.

The opposite of loneliness is belonging. But what is belonging?

Research over several decades (e.g. MacMillan & Chavis, 1986 and see an updated version at https://www.drdavidmcmillan.com/sense-of-community/sense-of-community) has concluded there are elements needed to build a “sense of community”: Membership, Influence, Satisfaction of needs, and emotional connection.

But we are not academics in a theoretical world. We are real people living amongst other people. So we asked people, what does it mean to belong.

The answers we got were Trust, Friendly, Caring and Mutual Support.

In our everyday world, we have to feel safe (Trust and Friendly), we have to feel connected (Mutual Caring) and we have to get something out of the relationship ( Mutual … Read the rest

Good News for 2024

Hope is alive in 2024. No doubt, we are facing many challenges. But when people collectively put their mind to things, amazing things can happen. Bringing people collectively together starts with our neighbours.

The Great News is that in Canada, USA and England, most people want stronger relations with their neighbours. And when Neighbours are connected across their differences, our societies become gentler, kinder and happier places.

So here is our BHAG ( the polite way of saying this is our Big Audacious Goal): By January 2029, Canada will have a new culture where it is normal for neighbours to know each other, care about each other and support each other. And more than that, the USA and England will also normalize the same kind of culture of caring for their neighbours.

Out of this culture, we can choose governments that put being human above all else, we will insist business operate in environmentally and socially responsible ways and we … Read the rest

Neighbours Need Help Connecting

75% of Canadians (Stats Canada) 60% of Americans do not know their neighbours , but most people want to know their neighbours. So why don’t they?

The short answer is because of a long term trend that comes out of stranger danger, a constant message that we are supposed to be self-reliant and government policies and lawyer threats that discourage people taking responsibility for each other, we have come to see connecting with neighbours as somewhere between awkward and terrifying. All of this has been exasperated by Covid isolation policies.

If you don’t know your neighbours, particularly the newer neighbours, you are in the majority. If you would want to have stronger connections with your neighbours, you are in the majority. And if you don’t know how to make those connections in a way that feels safe and comfortable, you are in the majority.

Yet making stronger connections with your neighbours is the best thing you can do for a … Read the rest